Ode to Campus Squirrels

O squirrels that haunt this campus fair with eyes so bright and shining,

Ye who attend so closely to the pattern of our dining,

I can no longer hold within this zeal and exaltation;

The majesty I see in you demands delineation.

I praise your tails, a common sight, from countless backsides sprung,

A stabilizing, insulating banner of squirreldom,

I praise your claws, your noses sharp, your ears so fluffed and shapely,

The whiskers that, with tender care, adorn your face ornately.

The squirrels at home seem wan and dull once placed among your number;

Their humble fur is mangy to your russet-colored lustre.

Their habits shy and meekly soft, and yours so bold and fearless,

And when it comes to begging you’re indubitably peerless.

Your ample mass, it’s plain to see, is no short of resplendent

Due in part to offerings on which you are dependent,

But quite aside from whence it came, it cannot be refuted;

Your health is splendid, better yet, than that of many students.

Though some, it’s true, may dub thee pest or vermin when enquired,

Of you, they claim, they have become unquestionably wearied,

Still I maintain, in accents sure, with squirrely effervescence,

This campus would be quite less fair without your constant presence.